"Bound No'th Blues" by Langston Hughes

  Since yesterday I posted a poetry piece my Countee Cullen I thought it only fair that I also post one from Langston Hughes who is "rumored" to have been gay as well.                     

 

                        “Bound No’th Blues”

                        Goin’ down the road, Lawd,

                        Goin’ down the road.

                        Down the road, Lawd,

                        Way, way down the road.

                        Got to find somebody

                        To help me carry this load.

                        Road’s in front o’ me,

                        Nothin’ to do but walk.

                        Road’s in front of me,

                        Walk…an’ walk…an’ walk.

                        I’d like to meet a good friend

                        To come along an’ talk.

                        Hates to be lonely,

                        Lawd, I hates to be sad.

                        Says I hates to be lonely,

                        Hates to be lonely an’ sad,

                        But ever friend you finds seems

                        Like they try to do you bad.

                        Road, road, road, O!

                        Road, road…road…road, road!

                        Road, road, road, O!

                        On the no’thern road.

                        These Mississippi towns ain’t

                        Fit fer a hoppin’ toad

Countee Cullen

 From author, poet and (possibly) gay man-- Countee Cullen (1903- 1946) "Brown Girl". 

I wanted to share this here as February is drawing to a close and so is African American

History month.  I also wanted to share this because I think Countee is nearly forgotten 

by the vast majority, except in the case of college classes.  I believe that in order to know 

exactly where we are going we have to fully understand and appreciate where we come from.

                The Brown Girl

         ‘I am as brown as brown can be,
  My eyes as black as a sloe;
  I am as brisk as a nightingale,
  And as wilde as any doe.
  ‘My love has sent me a love-letter,
  Not far from yonder town,
  That he could not fancy me,
  Because I was so brown.
  ‘I sent him his letter back again,
  For his love I valu’d not,
  Whether that he could fancy me
  Or whether he could not.
  ‘He sent me his letter back again,
  That he lay dangerous sick,
  That I might then go speedily
  To give him up his faith.’
  Now you shall hear what love she had
  Then for this love-sick man;
  She was a whole long summer’s day
  In a mile a going on.
  When she came to her love’s bed-side,
  Where he lay dangerous sick,
  She could not for laughing stand
  Upright upon her feet.
  She had a white wand all in her hand,
  And smoothd it all on his breast;
  ‘In faith and troth come pardon me,
  I hope your soul’s at rest.
  ‘I’ll do as much for my true-love
  As other maidens may;
  I’ll dance and sing on my love’s grave
  A whole twelvemonth and a day.’

An AIDS Free Generation: Is it possible

President Barack Obama included AIDS in his first State of the Union speech after his re-election:

“.... the United States will join with our allies to eradicate such extreme poverty in the next two decades by.... saving the world’s children from preventable deaths; and by realizing the promise of an AIDS-free generation, which is within our reach.”


Watching the State of the Union last night I was taken that President Obama made the mention that we could have an AIDS free generation and not only have it but it is within reach.  This clearly, to me, seems like an incredible idea but I seriously have my doubts--- and here is why:

1. I have been involved with the AIDS crisis since 1986 when I first became aware of it at the tender age of just 19 years old when a friend of mine was diagnosed with what then was "the gay cancer" and was within six months dead!  That has been nearly thirty years of involvement and I have heard a lot of things in those thirty years that promise great advances, possible cures and even scheduled treatments. I also have watched six hundred friends die from AIDS before I stopped counting. I also know that we are far from an AIDS free generation when it seems so little is being done.
2. FACT:   As the U.S. observes the tenth anniversary of the President’s Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief (PEPFAR), the landmark global AIDS program which President George W. Bush first proposed in his 2003 State of the Union address, advocates from AIDS Healthcare Foundation (AHF) urged President Obama to reconsider recent funding cuts he made to the lifesaving AIDS program which has saved millions of lives worldwide. AHF advocates also note that given his actions versus his rhetoric, President Obama’s highly touted goal of an ‘AIDS-free generation’—which received only a glancing mention in his State of the Union address last nightt—is unlikely to be achieved, as the funding cuts he’s instituted take devastating—and deadly—effect globally.       “By all accounts, PEPFAR has been a tremendous success, saving millions of lives while also serving as one of America’s most successful diplomacy efforts over the past decade,” said Michael Weinstein, President of AIDS Healthcare Foundation. “However, President Obama is also the first U.S. president to cut global AIDS funding, a shameful retreat at a time when, according to World Health Organization, there are 6.8 million who need treatment now but aren't receiving it, and at a time when we are seeing the real impact of treatment on saving lives and reducing new infections.”
   
   3. FACT:  A new survey focused on gay and bisexual men who use apps such as Grindr, Scruff and Manhunt to meet sexual partners found that nearly half had engaged in unprotected sex.
   Conducted by New York's Community Healthcare Network (CHN), "Zero Feet Away: Perpective on HIV/AIDS and Unprotected Sex in Men Who Have Sex With Men Utilizing Location-based Mobile Apps" found that although 80 percent of respondents said they were knowledgeable in how the HIV virus was transmitted, while 46.4 percent admitted to having bareback sex always, often or sometimes.
        The most frequently-cited reason for bare-backing among the 725 gay and bisexual men who were surveyed was "with condoms, [sex] does not feel the same."
        "Clearly, we've come a long way in educating people about HIV and AIDS," Dr. Freddy Molano, Assistant Vice President of HIV Programs and Services at CHN, said in the report. "Yet among certain populations, HIV/AIDS is on the ride, and that's alarming."
        Added co-author Renato Barucco: "The survey findings show a clear disconnect between the reasons why men engage in unprotected anal intercourse and the way prevention initiatives attempt to address risk behaviors."
   
    4. The following is simply my opinion and should be taken as thus:
   
   
    In nearly the nearly thirty years of work in the trenches I have seen it all-- people who are compliant with all of there drugs and still die, people who are complaint with all of their drugs and who somehow pull through (in my circle there are five of us, counting myself, who have lived twenty years or more with AIDS), I have seen lovers thrown out of their homes because one of them died and a family took literally everything, I have seen hospital trays left in the hall because no one wanted to go into the hospital room.  On that note I have a very good friend who works at a "Christian" Nursing home and the staff when they found out a specific resident had AIDS and was there to to die, wanted nothing to do with him, let alone for care him-- this was just LAST YEAR!
   
   
   Yet President Obama has the gall to say we "are within grasp of an AIDS free generation. Really?  People can not afford or get access to basic HIV medications in Africa and "we are within grasp of an AIDS free generation.  Really?  The government keeps cutting funding to not only research a cure, cut funding to Ryan White Access and cut funding for services for people living with AIDS and yet somehow we are within reach to an AIDS free generation.  Really?  
   
   
   We have the largest influx of gay bareback movies, gay bareback porn studios and a gay society-- which I myself am gay--are largely burned out, overworked, underpaid and in my opinion under appreciated when it comes to what we do for AIDS.  
   
   
   We have a young gay society under twenty-five who know precious little about the struggle we the generation into our forties and more who were there and saw first hand all of the death, all of the suffering, all of the protests in the streets and I will go out on a limb and say attend an ACT UP funeral of one of its members in front of the White House with the "dead" in a pine coffin laying in the streets and we the mourners demanding change.
   
   
   We have Californians having the discussion whether condoms should be on all porn shoots gay or straight, laws in California which have been passed and yet we can not move past the idea that somehow by "enforcing" condom use we are stepping on the toes of those wishing "their freedom of expression".  Really?  But yet somehow we are within grasp of a generation that is AIDS free.
   
   
   We have a vast number of Americans who still view "victims of HIV/AIDS" as the minorities-- you know the "them" we always speak of--- gays, African Americans, drug users, prostitutes, the poor, the uneducated, the brother on the down low, the Hispanic woman who sleeps around to much, the gay man who who still anonymous gay sex in bath houses or sex clubs.... when in all reality it has been more than this group of "minorities" for a LONG time.  Yet somehow we still can not have a honest, frank and open discussion about sex--- yet President Obama believes we are within grasp of an AIDS free generation.
   
   
   5.  FACT:   We can not and will not have an AIDS free generation when funding is cut. 
   
   
    We can not and will not have an AIDS free generation when people refuse to have an open, frank, honest discussion about sex.  
   
   
   We can not and will not have an AIDS free generation until the church as a whole not only embraces those living with the disease, but gets off their knees praying but actually does something to address the issue, help those in need of help and make a concentrated effort to embrace everyone into their fold.
   
   
   We can not and will not have an AIDS free generation until we do everything in our power to prevent sexual transmission to those who choose to make porn a career.
   
   
   We can not and will not have an AIDS free generation until we make AIDS medication to every single living human being on on the planet, and not only make it available but affordable.
   
   
   We can not and will not have an AIDS free generation until we do everything within our power to help our brothers and sisters, like myself, who are living with AIDS.  We need to be able to provide medical coverage that would continue at affordable rates for those wishing to return to work, we need to provide the time off needed by our employees if they need it for medical purposes to recover from an AIDS related illness, we need real equal employment opportunities for those living with AIDS.  And finally we need to provide affordable and accessible college opportunities to those living with AIDS-- many who do not realize that there is available funding where we could in all honesty pay very little out of pocket to not only get a degree but get a job that would once and for all get us out of poverty.
   
   
   Finally, we can not and will not have an AIDS free generation until we treat this disease as a human disease and not a minority disease.  That the attitude and change that needs to take place is what has happened with Americans embracing Cancer (i.e. The Susan G. Koman Fundraising events), Heart Disease and even Alzheimer's and until all of these things Mr. President happens we will NEVER have an AIDS free generation!

I'm so very tired: Bigotry and Stupidity

You know I was watching "Betty and Coretta" on Lifetime last night and I was moved to tears and heavy sadness.  I am to the point where I have reached the end of my rope.  Let me explain...

It seems here lately that I am having to defend my G-d given right to be an openly gay HIV+ man, and to live my life as one.  That the "Christian-right", being whatever domination they are have the right to judge me based on what I happen to with either my dick or my ass and where and how either of those items may or may not be used.  If G-d has all that free time to be that concerned with that aspect of my life, I have one thing to say--- Get a life, and preferably not mine.

According to the Talmud there are 613 mitzvot ("commandments") in the Torah/Old Testament.There are 248 positive mitzvot and 365 negative mitzvot given supplemented by seven mitzvot legislated by the rabbis/religious leaders of antiquity.

Items that are in the Bible:

1.   A glutton should be put to death--OK, all you morbidly obese people, go slit your throats because the Bible tells you too.
2. A woman's place is in the home under the husband authority at all times no questions asked or required-- so no more working women,no more equal rights for women, no more voting rights for women and certainly no equal pay for women.  Let alone having the wife own, inherit, or possess anything of any value.
3. A disobedient child should be stoned--OK, all you parents with G-d awful brats, you know who you are-- go stone your child to death right now.
4. All adulterers should be put to death-- OK, anyone who has ever cheated, which BTW includes a former-President, congressmen, senators, mayors, school teachers and religious leaders-- your next to be stoned to death.
5. Probably most importantly.. and this one is a shocker... The Emancipation Proclamation needs to be done away with because the Bible SUPPORTS slavery!
6. Some have gone so far as to say that the ENTIRE African race was born out of the curse of Ham! And have used the Bible to support their thinking.

Yet, somehow, the most pious of Christians would be simply be appalled  by these notions, and "Oh by the way darling, Christ himself did away with all the laws of the Old Testament with the whole idea of "Love thy neighbor as thyself", the Old Testament's is after all out of vogue."

Really--wow.  Love thy neighbor as thyself...... when you say LGBT folks are "not created in G-d's image, that LGBT Folks are in a continual state of sin for being LGBT, you ARE in fact saying that we are less than what G-d created--how self righteous of you to point that out. 

That employers have the right to fire us, landlords have the right to evict us, that the government has the right to deny us the right to marry, to adopt and to even love and in some countries has the right to put us to death... because you feel that this ONE particular Old Testament commandment is more relevant that than other 612 commandments of the Bible.

This goes into supporting organizations, or business that support anti-gay causes as well.  You give them your dollar, your dollar supports their hate, their rhetoric, and their bigotry plain and simple--no questions asked.

You want to stone me to death then darlin' keep in mind the words of Christ himself "Let him without ANY sin cast the first stone" oh and by the way darlin' here's your ROCK!

I have just had it and I don't care what the excuses are, if we as American were doing what we are doing to LGBTQ folks to any other race, anywhere on the planet someone would be screaming their bloody head off about it.  And I guess I am!

There are so many issues that we as a human race do not want to take a stand on---  you have someone like Gabby Gifford speaking out on gun violence, gun legislation and yet our elected officials have yet to take a stand and say that we as society do not need a gun that can shoot 300 hundred rounds in less than a minute.  Really, you need a gun of this power to go hunting Bambi, protect your home and your life--if this is the case then guess what I want to leave America.

You have someone like Harry Belafonte speak at the NAACP Awards about gun violence and yet did it fall on deaf ears.  It is not just the role of the black church to take stand on this issue but the church as a universal whole needs to say NO MORE!

You have masses of people who dying of AIDS because the costs or availability, or any other excuse are denied access to those drugs when the focus should be doing what we can to provide those desperately needed drugs to those who need them.

You have people tortured and killed in countries for whatever reason--sexuality, race or other topics simply because they are who they are,  When was the last time we spoke out about the gay man killed in Afghanistan or the genocide that is happening in Darfur--when we said "NEVER AGAIN" in the 1940's?

Are we that per-occupied with all of our technology, all of our commitments, all of the unnecessary things in life to take a stand for the things that really matter? Is it so important Johnny or Suzie belong to five after school activities, is it life changing if we don't talk on our cell phone constantly, that we forget the dead child killed in the streets yesterday only to talk about he dead child in the street killed today.

When have we done something for the poor, the underprivileged, the illiterate and the struggling in this country alone, not to mention the entire planet.  It has to start somewhere.  Mother Teresa started out simply--not being who she ended up being---Martin Luther King Jr.started as a simple country minister, Ghandi began earnestly and determined to change fate.

You want to be small minded--- do it on your clock, you want to be naive--- do it on your clock, you want to bury your head in the sand--- do it on your own clock.  I for one can't take it anymore.

I feel in the depths of my heart this is the real reason G-d in his divine wisdom left me alive nearly 22 years after being diagnosed with AIDS--- that I am to be the voice of the forgotten, the down-trodden, the struggling, the repressed, the hated and ridiculed and like Coretta Scott King I will strive to eradicate these issues till my dying breath.

In closing, I want to leave you with the words of Coretta Scott King:

Struggle is a never ending process. Freedom is never really won you earn it and win it in every generation. 

 The greatness of a community is most accurately measured by the compassionate actions of its members, ... a heart of grace and a soul generated by love. 

 I still hear people say that I should not be talking about the rights of lesbian and gay people and I should stick to the issue of racial justice. But I hasten to remind them that Martin Luther King Jr. said, "Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere."

Now, my challenge is to bring about change!