This site is about things I find interesting or feel you should know about--Fashion, men, news, politics, gay awareness issues and above all it's definitely GAY!
I am a Kent State University English Major,striving to be a writer, and I am a 40-something Gay man so this should be a really fun visit... grab your favorite cocktail and enjoy reading.
Well on a personal note last night was the Phi Sigma Pi get to know all of the "brothers" who were available to be big brothers to all of the incoming Initiate Brothers---- me being one of them.
Well last night I got really dressed up. Dark Green dress slacks, dress shoes, white dress shirt, a really beautiful checked brown tie, a cream colored suit coat complete with pocket handkerchief and a really dreamy scarf that tied all the colors together. I parked my car in the pay lot near the Student Center at KSU and started the very short one bock walk (not even) to the Student Center where we were meeting.
Coming towards me were two gentlemen that I have never met and they were walking diagonally towards the library. The one turns to the other and says "Get a load of the fag." I darn near ran to the Student Center doors. I haven't been called "a fag" in a very long time and I know that this "very nothing incident" could have been so much worse. Today though all I kept thinking about was the young men in the last week who have all died because they were bullied.
Now granted I have a partner, loving and caring neighbors who accept me and would do anything for me and a family that overall is supportive. I am and I know it, BLESSED beyond words! But it shook my very core. Maybe my attire was a little over the top but I am a FASHION DESIGN Major, hello! I thought I looked great, I felt great. First time I felt that good about my looks in a long time and it was all taken away, I hear those words often today "Get a load of the fag" and my heart breaks because for some gay people the teasing never ends until they take there own lives. Will the bigotry, prejudice, teasing and hatred ever stop? Will I live long enough to see it? I hope so.
In the meantime I feel like doing something to make a difference. This post is just the start!
Police in Tehachapi, California, will not pursue charges against students who taunted and bullied 13-year old gay student Seth Walsh, who hung himself nine days ago and was taken off of life support yesterday.
"Several of the kids that we talked to broke down into tears," said police chief Jeff Kermode. "They had never expected an outcome such as this." Other students remain in shock over Walsh's tragic death, and seem to understand that homophobic bullying played a role in Walsh's suicide, yet that doesn't mean they'll break what prevention counselor Daryl Thiesen calls the "culture of silence" that surrounds bullying.
"You're told you shouldn't be a snitch or tattler," said Thiesen.
Walsh's death comes one day after Texas teen Asher Brown shot himself over anti-gay bullying. These incidents are not isolated, America. This isn't a gay problem, nor are these stories just about nasty brats.
We're experiencing an anti-gay bullying epidemic, and one that needs to be addressed, for the aforementioned culture of silence isn't just killing kids, it's killing our nation's future.
We should all heed the Walsh family's statement on the subject: "A negative action ... by adults and children ... will not solve or help anyone! Violence is not the answer! Please everyone, be kind and love one another!"
I've included a video made by Walsh's family and friends, AFTER THE JUMP. Be warned, however, that the video will yield tears. So, if you don't want to be puffy at work, wait until you get home.
The following is an article from online that I found about the current suicide of Rutgers Freshman, Tyler Clememti. The article was originally posted on FanHouse and was written by Clay Travis.
Thanks to technology we can do things that our grandparents would have never dreamed of doing. Thanks to that same technology people can also commit crimes that would have once seemed impossible.
In the wake of Rutgers freshman, Tyler Clementi's suicide, reportedly brought on by the taping of his sexual encounter by other college students, it's worth considering how technology has fundamentally altered our conceptions of privacy. One of the two defendants in this case, Dharun Ravi, used Twitter, ichat, and a webcam to secretly videotape his roommate as he engaged in a sexual encounter with another man. Clementi was so distraught over the distribution of these images over the Internet that he leaped to his death from New York City's George Washington Bridge.
In the wake of Clementi's suicide, Ravi and another woman/student, Molly Wei, have been charged with violating New Jersey's invasion of privacy statutes. Those statutes make it a crime "to collect or view images depicting nudity or sexual contact involving another individual without that person's consent." There is also a separate crime should those images be transmitted. In addition to these charges, gay rights groups have called for Ravi and Wei to be charged with hate crimes as well, alleging that their motivation was based upon Clementi's sexuality.
Whether the defendants are also charged with a hate crime will likely depend on if the state of New Jersey can uncover any evidence that their acts were motivated by Clementi's homosexuality. In making this determination, the state will investigate text messages, emails, and sundry other technological clues to uncover the motivations behind the acts. In the meantime, it's worth considering what Clementi's suicide teaches us about the rapidly shifting arena of cyber crime and how many ways in which an individual's privacy can be invaded that weren't even possible 10 years ago.
Where once an individual student would have had a difficult time invading the privacy of another student, now any student in a dorm can be a victim of this crime. Indeed, while the individuals charged in with this crime may be condemned for their acts, surreptitious recording of an individual without that individual's consent is not uncommon. Last year, ESPN's Erin Andrews became a high-profile victim of secret videotaping while she was in her hotel room. What makes the Rutgers crime unique isn't the crime itself, it's the reaction of the victim to the crime.
And that, more than anything else, points to the dangers inherent in invasion of privacy crimes. The defendants in this case are likely to argue that they were unaware that Clementi would react as he did to their secret videotaping and that they considered this nothing more than a prank. Indeed, the actual crime here has been subsumed by Clementi's reaction to the crime. Imagine that rather than being driven to suicide, Clementi merely turns in these students to Rutgers for violating his privacy.
Do we ever hear about the crime? Does it receive any publicity?
Probably not. The students likely receive probation. At most, maybe they're forced to withdraw from school. That's it.
Instead we're all horrified, justifiably so, by Clementi's reaction when his privacy was invaded. And that reaction, more than anything, should serve as a teachable moment for parents, children, and educators. Do students truly realize the severity of the reactions that their modern acts can provoke? Or has technology so pervaded their lives that the severity of the act itself -- broadcasting someone engaged in a sexual act without consent -- been devalued? Indeed, in an age when celebrities hawk sex tapes and become even more famous than they already were, have we all been desensitized to the idea of what privacy means?
That's a broad question without an easy answer. Isn't the out that we are punishing the defendants for the result of their act more than the actual act itself? And if that's the case isn't that backward? Shouldn't we be treating the crime as severe no matter how the defendant reacts? Otherwise how can we demonstrate that even in the age of Facebook an individual right to privacy still exists?
So what can this case teach us? First, that invasion of privacy is a serious crime regardless of what reaction it provokes. Second, you can't predict how anyone is going to deal with cyber-bullying, harassment, or the invasion of his privacy. Many will cope without any issues. Others, as we see with Clementi, may never be able to escape the wrong that was perpetrated against them.
In our civil courts, that is the non-criminal field of law, the thin-skulled plaintiff rule has existed for generations. Pursuant to the thin-skulled plaintiff rule if you behave in a negligent manner that leads to another individual's injury, you are responsible for all the damages that ensue as a result of your act. That's even though you had no clue that the plaintiff in your situation had a thin-skull and was more susceptible to damage than he or she appeared.
The rule is applied in a criminal setting as well, but in our modern era maybe it should receive a new name, the thin-skinned expectation. From this point forward, you should assume that everything you do to invade someone else's privacy could be the precipitating factor that sets them off on a path of destruction. Did the defendants in this case believe that Clementi might commit suicide based upon what they considered to be a prank? Probably not. Should they have? Who knows. Should every student in America think about Clementi in the future when they consider invading another student's privacy for sport.
You bet.
It's the only way any of us can learn a lesson from a tragedy.
I know two posts in one day, your probably thinking how in G-d's name can one queen have so much to say in one day? Well kids, today just happens to also be my sweetie's birthday. Jim turns sixty-nine today and I am sure he doesn't feel a day over 40. G-d knows he acts much younger than he is and he is so physically active as well.
It is hard because this morning was my tutoring at Mason Elementary that I am doing in conjunction with my College Writing II class, than my College Writing II class and then tonight of all nights is when we meet all of the brothers/sisters of Phi Sigma Pi and we interview them to be our Big brother/sister through the inititation process. We get the announcement of who picked us on Sunday. This meeting starts at 5 and runs till 10 tonight which means I get home at 11. It also means I end up with about 3 hours with Jim today.
Sorry sweetie, I know it has to be hard not having me there but it doesn't mean I love you any less. We will have time this weekend to do something fun--maybe dinner out or something.
I want to start off by saying I have not blogged about ProjectRunwaySeasonEight because I knew the amount of work it would take to do and do it well. Kids, I don't have that kind of time this semester. It doesn't mean I am not watching and certainly doesn't mean I don't care; it is just that their is no time honestly. I have been with all of you in loving some of the fashion this season on the show and down right hating some of it as well. I have been with you when we all thought Gretchen was being a big b*tch but then her real personality came through and well now she is rather nice. I miss Peach and her wonderful phrasing "Don't show the good china."
On to the real reason for this post..... MondoGuerra. Last night's challenge was to be inspired by something very personal and very moving from your past. I would be inclined to do something that changed my life forever personally. While some embraced the culture they were raised in, or an area where they lived our boy Mondo was well inspired by this ten year old secret he has held.
He said last night that he was from a devout "old world" thinking Catholic background and that his mother had asked him not to come out to his father as being gay. That in itself kids could have been an outfit. But Mondo's secret was even bigger than that and NO ONE knew. Till last night.
The designers were of course asked to once again use technology to design the print for the material they were going to use and while it seemed like it took forever for Mondo's secret to be revealed to us the viewers I NEVER saw it coming. I know kids naive isn't it. I was stunned, speechless and crying.
Mondo had held from everyone that he was HIV positive for TEN YEARS! I can't begin to imagine the pain he was in all that time. Feeling he couldn't talk about it to anyone. Then shortly after his "private" on camera confession to us the viewers in walks his mother. Oy Vey. We never did see Mondo tell his mother about his status and I am hoping that he had the opportunity to do so before last night's show. You could see Mondo's pain, it was so real and raw.
All it took was Nina Garcia asking "I wish I knew the story." At first it seemed like this look from Mondo was "Good luck lady, because I am not about to tell you of all people." Then it happened and the back story about the pain, the loneliness. I sat crying my eyes out. I so wanted to and still want to hug Mondo and tell him everything is going to work out.
Then of course MichaelKors comments about turning something that potentially could have been very sad into something very vibrant, very joyful and very beautiful. That we, as not only designers but as people, need to see the positive in situations and to somehow look beyond the pain and loss and all of the other crap to what we really have. That we are thriving, creating, loving creatures no matter even if no one accepts us or supports us. Kids, it was painful to watch. It was also like MichaelKors, herself, b*tch slapped me into reality and was speaking directly to me. It left me changed.
That even though my family will never get what I am fully doing and why; that they will never understand my career; that my world of further education and fashion is worlds away from where they are---it doesn't matter at all. I don't need all of that, as Jim says that I am doing it for myself and no one else.
Mondo, darling, if you by chance you are reading this you are not alone by far. Your an inspiration to those like yourself who are afraid to come out. You are also an inspiration to those of us who have had this disease for a long time as well. That yes we can, yes we will and yes it is ok to want it more than life itself. Mondo, it took great courage to do what you did and I applaud you for doing it. I am here if ever, for some reason, you need someone to lean on. There should be more Mondo's in the world.
In age of where it seems like gay kids are killing themselves more than ever before, we need afirmative, loving, brave, courageous men and women to come out about who they are. To tell the world it is ok to be who you are that the face of AIDS has changed. The diagnosis of AIDS has changed. That we twentysome years into this disease ned to be more understanding, more supportive and more encouraging so that those living with it can and do come out.
Well until tomorrow kids, I am so glad we had this time together.
OK I am a little slow in reporting this but Karl Lagerfeld apparently has a new boyfriend in uber super male model Baptiste Giabiconi, one of the uber Chanel models. Karl and Baptiste have been found in some locations together which lead to these conclusions and apparently for some ( wish I was one of them) some intimate conversations have been overheard. Oh to be a fly on the wall to hear what they are saying.
Karl Otto Lagerfeldt born September 10, 1933 (making Lagerfeld 77 years old) in Hamburg. Karl is a German fashion designer and artist based in Paris, France. He has collaborated on a variety of fashion and art related projects, most notably as head designer and creative director for the fashion house Chanel. Lagerfeld helms his own label fashion house, as well as the Italian house Fendi. Of course this makes for a very busy man, but we all know what they say about all work.
Now Lagerfeld has lot a ton of weight from years ago and darlings he looks utterly fabulous, he still sports that infamous ponytail and dresses more than half his age, which for some would be very cliche. For me, if you got it honey flaunt it and Lagerfeld thankfully does. I do wish you would see him more often with his other trademark from years ago--his fan! It added in my opinion to his persona, his mystique and overall character.
His personal style has always been for some people a tad flamboyant but tasteful just like the Chanel label itself which I SIMPLY ADORE. Something is working right for Lagerfeld because he is with Baptiste after all.
I did a little research into our boy Baptiste and found what I think are some really great pictures of him and Karl besides some of his publicity shots.
Apparently the two have been seen together in the streets of Paris and some rather intimate conversations have been overheard so many believe they are quite the pair. One of the photographs in this post if of the brand new Chanel motorcycle. Yes kids you read that right a CHANEL motorcycle!! Can you imagine owning that! Makes you wonder what an item like that would cost? Or was it specfically designed for and given to Baptiste as a present? Could it all have been just this huge publicity stunt for Chanel? I wonder how does one find these things out? Who does one ask to find these things out? Or is it just the people in the inner circle that is the very life of Lagerfeld himself and the life of House of Chanel?
I think it just genius to have come up with the idea of a Chanel motorcycle even if it was just one and just one time even for the sake of publicity. I am sure people like myself sat up and took notice, becaus ethis kind of thing as far as I know has never been done before.
Also with a little further searching I came across some nearnudeshots of our handsome devil Baptiste, no wonder Lagerfeld is in love, who wouldn't be with a guy in bed with you that looks like Baptiste or a guy like Baptiste even on your arm at some gala party? Baptiste's birthplace if you would like to know is Marseille, France.
Height is reported to be 6'2"
Age: 21( a 56 year age difference by the way kids) (I made a mistake in previous post about Baptiste's age so I do apologize--thanks Kirzia for pointing that out)
Chest 39
Waist 30.5 (G-d I wish my waist was this little)
Men Shoe 10.5
Hair Brown
Eyes Hazel
When Naomi Campbell met Baptiste in Moscow in 2009, she told him, “It’s not right: We all have defects. You have none.” What a wonderful compliment to be made in my opinion and from someone as wonderful as Uber supermodel Naomi, makes me wonder what she feels "are her defects".
In an interview with Womens Wear Daily Karl Lagerfeld described Baptiste as “a boy version of Gisele [Bündchen]: skinny, skinny but with an athletic body — good for clothes and great with no clothes.” Hopefully, Lagerfeld wasted no time in finding out how uber gorgeous Baptiste was naked but then I guess some things we will never know. Well sorry I was ever so late posting this but I do hope you enjoyed the photos of Baptiste. Until next time, I am so glad we had this time together.
I am sorry not to have posted the last few days but I wasn't exactly feeling all to well. Then you throw in that this last weekend was my crash weekend you begin to understand slightly why I didn't blog. When I wasn't sleeping, I was studying. I think I made up some of the sleep I have lost in the last two weeks, I was just so utterly exhausted.
Sunday afternoon was my big night as I got pinned as an initiate to Phi Sigma Phi the honor's fraternity. It was the whole highlight of my whole week. I stood there slightly crying as I took the oath of secrecy and brotherhood. It made all the work during the Spring Semester feel so worth while. Keep your fingers crossed as I am running for the position of President and Vice President of our Class in the fraternity. Voting I believe is this Sunday.
Needless to say I got no sewing done on the WomenofHistory outfit done and I know I am going to pushed into some real overtime to try to get it done on time. If I could just not feel so tired. It may not end till the end of the semester, because of all the pending work.
Mrs Carr at Kent asked me to participate in an upcoming Coat Challenge in October. We will be designing a Cotton Sateen Coat inspired by Jackie Kennedy Onassis. Not only designing the coat but also a print that will be put on the fabric. I was thrilled to be asked so I said YES!
Well for now that is it, so thank you for this time we had together.
I have said it before, and I will say it again, that the dreams that you have at night while fast asleep are really a gate way into your soul. It is a window into your deepest wishes, wants and desires. First off let me say I have not been sleeping well at all for over a week. I get about four hours if I am lucky and frankly I feel like it has me rather short with people and very forgetful.
With that said last night I was so pleased because I got my full eight hours. Partially I think because I think I took a pain pill because my chest and legs were killing me. Same old sh*t that I talk about from time to time that I think largely is Fibromyalgia related. But with pain pill in toe I slept like a baby and dreamt for the first time in months.
In my dream I was upstairs in my studio, which in my dream was MUCH bigger than it is now, and in walks Chairce who I mentioned yesterday's post. She wants me to design her entire new upcoming concert. Needless to say I was some what stunned, she said twenty outfits that fit the songs and mood she wants to convery. I asked "when she needed them" she said five months away. I called for my assistant, in dreams I guess I have an assitant. I can't remember HIS name but he was tall, dashing and simply brillant. I said " we have our work cut out for us but I know we can do it.
While the three of us were chatting in walks, honest to G-d Celine Dion. I about pissed myself. She walks over to me kisses me on both cheeks like the French do. She is flawlessly gorgeous of course and says "Charles darling, I need you to design this Red Carpet affair for the upcoming Music Awards thing I am nominated for and Charice told me what a genius you are do you think you can" all of course with a French accent that is very seductive. I smiled so sweetly and said "Of course anything for you mon cherie."
I awoke briefly and very shortly fell asleep This time I was in a much larger space than even the dream before that is apprently my studio and I am sitting at my fabric table with the legendary icon Carol Burnett. "Darling, I have this huge Kennedy's Honor event coming up where they are giving me this huge award and well you know Bob Mackie has retired a little bit ago. I hear it gets no better than you. Can you and would you design a gown of exquiste quality for this gala event? Celione Dion raved so much about you darling, it was so sweet and charming. I blushed. I sat tearing up, "Carol I would be delighted."
In walks honest to G-d Gay Super Icon and Fierce Goddess herself CHER! I fainted, deadway. Carol Burnett picks me up, dust me off. "Darling, get it together. I hope you don't mind but I called my friend Cher and said to meet us here." I sat crying. Cher in typical Cher fashion walks over and bitch slaps me right across the face and says "Snap out of it" ala Moonstruck. I apologize. I am sorry Cher but I have adored you all my life and now you are standing in MY STUDIO.
"Yeah well, duh darling. Carol said I had to see you and so did Celine. I have this upcoming one night concert affair I am doing in Vegas darling and well I want you to do all the sets, costumes and even some publicity outfits for the show. I fainted again. Cher brought me to my feet. "Darling, the fainting is growing old." She smiles "But it is flattering, g-d knows I love my gays."
I awoke my pillow was damp, apparently I was having some minor night sweats. I am was smiling though, crying too. I know its just a dream but it all seemed so real. It seemed as if I was really in their presence. Like all the hard work was paying off. Somebody finally HAD NOTICED me!
Well last night I was in my "theatre glory" with the brand new season of Glee. Kids, I absolutely adore this show more than breathing, I have it bad. Maybe it is because I am a "BroadwayQueen" as they say but there isn't anything better than a great story with great music that you leave singing when you leave the theatre. Besides as a Broadway Queen you get your own tiara . Kidding!
With a guest appearance by Charice, the Filipino girl featured on Oprah a few times, Charice plays a girl named Sunshine. I was once again in love with this 16 year old girl with the voice of a grown woman. Charice first preformed part of the Lady Gaga hit Telephone.
Charice/Sunshine was fierce, to fierce actually for character Rachel who turns in to Miss Uber b*tch and sends poor Sunshine to a crack house for her audition. Well kids you don't f*ck with diva's. Trust me I know being a diva at time myself.
Our girl Sunshine belts out one of my favorite songs of all time "Listen". I know I have posted this song twice before but kids there is something that she brings to this song that I have not gotten before. It is of course from the story line, it is the whole I know you sent me to a crack house because I threaten you well TOUGH SH*T! Because b*th I am going deliver it and boy does she. This kind of "F" you done with a song and all attitude.
Of course Rachel realizes she has been a first class jerk and decides to put her regret into song as well.
I bring this whole thing up because sometimes we just have those days where we want to be the uber b*tch for no real good reason at all. Maybe the whole thing has been building for a long time and it just feels good to let the witch out. Claws flying, attitude soaring, bitchiness in full force and we are embracing it and celebrating it. Then we regret it. At height of the moment it feels great, feels powerful and I guess my day was yesterday. I didn't blow up, but I probably over reacted. Thank god no one was there to see me do it. I have the good sense to keep my head in public and than lose it when I am by myself. That way I am not embarrassed.
Oh well. I guess we all have moments where we have melt downs. Thankfully mine are not that often and are hardlyever public. Well kids thanks for the time we have had together.
Not much here for me to really talk about. I hated missing Liza on Oprah today as was in class. I did LOVE tonight's new episode of Glee and have all my homework for tomorrow done already. Tomorrow also starts my tutor responsibilities at Mason Elementary. Its part of my College Writing II Class and I am nervous to say the least. Keep me in your thoughts that it all goes well.
Hope you have been enjoying the vintage fashion posts I maybe do some more as I found this great web site with oodles of vintage fashion. I also want to take the time and remind everyone I am on Twitter as well and hopefully in some time I will be doing more there once I get a better system to do it than my current refualr cell phone, keeping my fingers crossed.
Hopefully also tomorrow I can spend a lot of time on the Women in History Fashion Show outfit as I am really nervous about that. In the meantime thanks to all the readers, readership since this new blooger traking thing started has steadily going up every month and I APPRECIATE IT!
I would like to her what you would like to see here as well specific fashion, topics or whatever. After all maybe weboth can grow a little. Well until next time, I am so glad we had this time together
Well thankfully I took the time to finally sit down and cut out the majority of the patterns for the Mary Todd Lincoln inspired/recreation dress for the FamousWomenFashionShow in October. Going to work my head off to get it the way I want it to look but in all honesty I know I can and, more than likely will, do it.
In a way this may be the dress that brings back some of my self confidence. I also moved all of the doll boxes out of the sewing room closet andinto the Oz room closet. My fashion books and magazines are now on the shelf in that closet. It will need an additional brace I think to hold the weight. Will have to ask my dad about it when he is out again. Moving those books freed up some shelf space in my sewing room.
I found a clothing rod to put in the closet to hang my own creations plus the few vintage/antique pieces I do not want to cut up. Maybe now I can slowly buy more antque clothing I find intersting and worth having. Of course you all can send me stuff at least 60 years old or more for the small but growing collection. I would be indebted forever. I am especially interested in antique men's clothing and women's 1930's and before as well as couture of course.
If you didn't catch Marth Stewart last night on Hallmark, you kids missed one hell of a show. It was"The Women in Fashion" and the interviews, the clothes and the insight was simply wonderful. If they re-run it you kids need to watch it. Then today on her daytime show Martha had the entire hour about fashion, it was love for me! It did bring up this whole idea, for me anyway, why is it you never hardly see antique men's clothing in antique store or malls or even shows for sale? Pickings are slim kids, maybe these men wore their clothes out. Maybe there is no interest in antique men's clothing. I wonder. What all do you think.
My big passion right now would be vintage bowties. There is something about a man in a bowtie and frankly believe it or not I don't own one. Maybe it should be on my wish list. Well anyway, I am glad we had this time together. Till next time.
I can't believe this is post 501, where does the time go? Somehow you all have been reading along, changes and all from those early days of doom and gloom that the posts where to the postings about Wizard of Oz and collecting to now fashion. You my readers have been faithful and somehow readership just keeps soaring. Maybe I have hit on something, maybe I am so frank, so honest, so open people are intrigued by what I will say next. Maybe it is because I talk about fashion or things that intrest me. Maybe its becasue as Sally Field said "You like me, you really like me." I would love to know what it is that makes you come back reading.
This weekend believe it or not was spent doing nothing more than homework. The whole damn freaking weekend, but in all reality I know it will pay off in the end. Maybe I will make the Dean's List again this semester, maybe somebody will notice how hard I am working and how very desperately I want this more than life itself.
Maybe it will pay off in my intership when the time comes, or pay off when I go to study abroad or when I leave for the work force because people will see how dedicated I am and how badly I want it. Facebook asks the question in some online quizzes about the people you know if they would sell everything to get successful. The answer for me is a very simple YES! No doubt in my mind, no regret, no questions. You get tired of being nobody. You get tired of feeling like yo haven't made a difference. You get tired of feeling lonely. You get tired of not being what you want and need to be for yourself. If so many people can do it why can't I?
I think for me the answer is I need to get more focused on how I spend alot of my time. So many hours a day for homework, so many hours a day to write which I love and so many an hours a day to sew which for me is breathing. To create IS LIFE, without it there is literally nothing! Brutal isn't it? It though is the truth and I am beginning to understand it.
I am going to go out on a limb and say at the moment I feel very desperately alone. In the near month back in school my family has not called once to see how I am. To see how things are going in school. To see if I am alright. It grows tiring. I feel like I have to "pull teeth" almost to get any response and I am tired of it beyond words. I want people involved in my life because they want to be. I want people to know what I am doing because they want to know. I need somehow to know I am needed in someway and that i make the difference. Sounds desperate doesn't it? I guess it is, but it is the raw truth.
I have this huge project with the "Women of History Fashion Show" that I HAVE to start tomorrow or I will never get it done. I need to finish homework that is due Wednesday and frankly I need to get back to myself into the habit of meditating daily and doing yoga daily somehow. Like I have said before and I will say it again I feel like so much of time is wasted. How all do you feel about the time you have? I would love knowing I am not alone.
Well until next time kids I am so glad we had this time together and I hope you have been enjoying the new mood boards I have been posting.
